We’ve Been Thinking About Love All Wrong
May 07, 2025 at 08:42PMSuleika Jaouad wrote “Life, Interrupted,” a New York Times series about living with cancer as a young adult. After a lifetime of ephemeral friendships, Jaouad recalls the deep bond she formed with Anjali, a woman who was fighting cancer at the same time. In an excerpt of her new work of nonfiction, “The Book of Alchemy,” Jaouad explores the meaning of love and friendship as she reflects on offering music, comfort, and simply being present for Anjali during her final days.
I remember a nurse watching us from the hallway. Later, she told me that in all her years of working in hospice, she had never seen that before—other young people with bald heads and waifish bodies ushering a fellow patient through their final days. I understood why she was taken by the sight. To watch anyone die is scary, and it’s even scarier to watch someone die from the same disease that might kill you. No one would have blamed us for avoiding it, but we were all struck by the fact that Anjali had no family. Her great fear was that she would die alone, and we wouldn’t let that happen.
Being with Anjali through those days remains one of the most harrowingly beautiful and meaningful experiences of my life. I felt like I got to meet Anjali the child—the Anjali who had not yet been hurt, betrayed, or abandoned by the world. She softened; she became calm. Every time her eyelids fluttered open, she would reach for my hand. She was so skinny, and her big, dark-brown eyes seemed even bigger by contrast. Tender, open, unarmored, she seemed—paradoxically—healed.
from Longreads https://longreads.com/2025/05/07/weve-been-thinking-about-love-all-wrong/
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